Thursday, November 20, 2008

I wish I was Pam.

Mmmmmm, I haven't written on here in a long time! Let me tell you about things!
Yesterday. I went to the library to do some homework at like 9:30 in the evening time hours. Annnnnddd, I spent all of my time on the 5th floor--contemporary art and literature!--sitting by the window with an Oreo Mint Blast, taking career placement tests online. The results--nothing. It told me I like being ridiculous and have no sense of responsibility and I love flowers and colors and pretty words. Really? Okay. Thanks. So, then I decided to watch The Office on my compy. It was the episode where Pam screams out, "That's what she said! That's what she said!" to Jim on bluetooth while she's in New York. Such hilarity. I wish I was Pam. Anyway, about half-way through the episode, my phone vibrated in my purse! A text message! I leaped! It was from Marie-butt (one of my suitemates, for those of you who don't follow every aspect of my life). She said: "I'm eating human collagen. Am nam nam." She's probably my favorite cannibal ever.

We have this on-going joke about pudding. How it turns humans into human-eaters. This is how it goes. Gelatin is made up of collagen. Humans have collagen--what if, for some odd reason, there's an animal collagen shortage at some point in the future? This, of course, only means that there is a pudding shortage. And, me, being the cynic that I am, thought of this brilliant plot. Our government. As splendid and proper as it may someday going to muster up this plan. Upon the shortage of pudding, the government is going to send the military into homes of innocent families, looking for human "sacrifices". WE MUST HAVE OUR SNACK PACKS. I'm so deranged. Anyway, I took out some books! I got "Orlando" by Virginia Woolf, and a few books about surrealism. Yayayayay. And I saw my old coworker from Starbucks (he quit)...he checked out my books for me. SILLY LIBRARIANS. It was awkward, for some reason. Probably because I'm not used to much human contact.

I started out today reading Plato and answered lame questions, when I realized that I hate EVERYTHING. I'm sick of school, and I, frankly, don't give a shit anymore. OK--I don't hate everything. I just want time to be ridiculous. I wanna roll around on the floor in Marie's room and interpret art with her. OKAY, the other day, Marie interpreted art from my Ecstasy book, and it was soooo funny. She thinks very logically, and so, hilarity ensued. There was a picture of a model in the rain forest, holding hands with a robot, and they were sitting next to a body of water and some sort of floor lamp. And she was like, " How can the lamp work in the rain forest? I think this one means our houses shouldn't have roofs." She told me she wants me to continue to get "fun art books" from the library so that she can interpret it for me. She's so cute. And I heart her.

The rest of today was fine, though. It snowed lots and lots! I went with Lindsey to the doctor because she's having back problems, which, in turn, make her heart condition worse! Agh! We had a fun time together, though! And the doctor fixed her right up! We went to Starbucks after we drove around for like 3 hours and talked about how jaded and bitchy we are (i.e., we're jaded bitches). Annnnd, obviously, the most awkward person alive was working. One of my coworkers told my other coworkers that he wanted to sleep with me! Is that REALLY something you wanna be spreading around? I didn't think so. Before we went in, Lindsey said to me, "Do you want me to just go up to him and be like, 'I just really want to have sex with you' " And I said, "Yes. Please." But, obviously, she didn't. He was uber awkward to me, too. Ugh. Things. Why am I such a freak?

I want to learn how to paint. I draw things always. And colors make me happy. I also want to crochet my sister a hat. Or a sweater. Or a sweater with a matching hat. All I really know is...I do not want to go to my classes tomorrow. I want to watch national geographic in my jammies and draw you a picture of a sunset and chickens. KTHANX.

I leave you with Paul Eluard:

"I have not always had this certainty, this pessimism which reassures the best among us. There was a time when my friends laughed at me. I was not the master of my words. A certain indifference, I have not always known well what I wanted to say, but most often it was because I had nothing to say. The necessity of speaking and the desire not to be heard. My life hanging only by a thread.

There was a time when I seemed to understand nothing. My chains floated on the water.

All my desires are born of my dreams. And I have proven my love with words. To what fantastic creatures have I entrusted myself, in what dolorous and ravishing world has my imagination enclosed me? I am sure of having been loved in the most mysterious of domains, my own. The language of my love does not belong to human language, my human body does not touch the flesh of my love. My amorous imagination has always been constant and high enough so that nothing could attempt to convince me of error."

Stay tuned: Next posting will ACTUALLY be about mangoes. Colors, shapes, tastes, origins, all varieties of mangoes.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

And On the Radio. You Hear November Rain.

I hate not having a camera. My Canon powershot (which actually lasted me about five solid years) is now dead. And it's all my fault. I spilled water on him. SadsadsadsadsadFACE. (Remember FACE from Nickelodeon?) Once I get a new camera for Christmas (wantwantwant a Nikon!), I'm going to start posting pictures on here! Most likely of flowers and snow and beautiful things and [beautiful, maybe] people! Yay. Want.

New things. Hm. I was just reading this book [which is really, really overdue to the library! ahh!] by the editors of the Green Living Journal, and one of the chapters of the book is called "Why to Bike to Work"... Which, by the way, I would love to do, if I had a bike in Ohio, or at all...I always see one of my coworkers, Andy, biking to work, and I always beep at him and wave freakishly, as I pull in the parking lot with ease in my little red nissan, and I don't know if he thinks it's funny or not. He's like 47 years old. Oh well. Anyway. I want a bike. And, this chapter gave a whole list of reasons why you should bike to work. Here's the best ones:
  • Driving too much results in eye-strain, backaches, migraines, weight gain, and highway hypnosis. Bicycling too much results in sexy calves and thigh muscles.
  • Drivers who fall asleep at the wheel result in 20,000 accidents per year. Bicyclists who fall asleep simply fall down.
  • Road-rage abounds. Bike-lane rage is as yet unheard of.
  • A car requires insurance, registration, and a valid California license. A bicycle requires the sense of balance of an eight-year-old.
Those were just the funny ones, but, biking to work is definitey an obvious choice to help with global sustainability! So hooray for bikes! I should get one!

I was mainly reading this book about sustainability because I have to do a presentation for my communications module about my major--so, I chose an aspect of photojournalism. I found this photographer, Perry Dilbeck, who started a 10 year documentary project [which is now titled The Last Harvest] about a group of farmers and the deterioration of their farms and inevitably, their livelihood, due to an increase in big factory farms and sooo much consumerism! Yay! So, yeah, basically, I want to feature this photo-story in my presentation, and kind of talk about how local farms are beneficial to us--how they're more environmentally friendly (i.e., less carbon emissions from big factory trucks delivering veggies and they're healthier! less chemicals flying all over the place!) and possibly a few other photographic stories addressing environmentally friendly causes and some photographic trends behind the creation of the actual pictures. (FARM SHARES.)

Liz is going to make me vegan when I go home. I am nervous.

In other news. I'm a freak! No, I don't know. My apartment applications with the Boulders' was approved! Yay! Neighbors with Lulu! My first apartment ever! I'm a grown up! I'm excited to go back home. I was just looking at pictures of some of my friends from home, all hanging out in Amherst, and I was jealous. I want. Soon.

I'm going to make a Mocha syrup snow angel on the floor behind the bar at work on Saturday morning. If they're going to make me open at 5 am, I'm going to make things interesting. Yes I am.

Well, it's time for din-dins! I'm going to make pasta and tofu and num nums!

Today. I will leave you with a quote from my Lindsey-face.
(Over text message)
Boy: Hey, what're you up to?
Lindsey: (thinks for a minute, looks down at her donuts in her lap) Eating 3 donuts...OM NOM NOM...I mean, being popular.

<3 Kulu

Tuesday, November 4, 2008


Hehehe Liz...


"NPR is projecting Democrat Barack Obama as the winner in the vital swing states of Pennsylvania and Ohio. If Obama holds every state that John Kerry won in 2004, he will be able to claim more than 270 electoral votes — enough to clinch the presidency.

Ohio is Obama's first pickup of a state that went for President Bush in 2004. The loss of the Buckeye State represents a crushing blow to Republican John McCain, whose campaign worked hard for the state's 20 electoral votes. No Republican has ever been elected president without winning Ohio.

Obama's ambitious strategy to reshape the electoral map appears to be succeeding. The first African-American to head a major-party ticket has had strong showings in a number of states, including some that have not voted Republican in decades, as exit polls showed the economy was the main issue on voters' minds.

In the key swing state of Virginia, long a Republican stronghold, early exit polls showed Obama leading across all age groups except those 65 and older, across income and education levels, and among all demographics except whites.

And in the crucial states of Pennsylvania and Minnesota, as well as more than a dozen other states, NPR projects Obama as the winner; Republican John McCain is projected to win in Kentucky, Tennessee, Arkansas and Alabama, among others.

With Pennsylvania going blue, McCain has little room to maneuver: In order to reach the 270 electoral votes needed to win the presidency, he must win every state President Bush carried in 2004. The race remains too close to call in North Carolina, Indiana and Florida — all states that Bush won four years ago.

The dramatic economic downturn in the last weeks of the campaign played to candidate Obama's advantage, as polls showed voters trusted him more to deal with the crisis. Two thirds of voters leaving the polls said they were worried or very worried that the financial crisis will affect their family.

The dramatic economic downturn in the last weeks of the campaign played to candidate Obama's advantage. As polls closed in some states, Democratic candidate Barack Obama appeared to have the edge in exit polls which showed the economy as the main issue on voters' minds. Two-thirds of voters leaving the polls said they were worried or very worried that the financial crisis will affect their family.

Yumei Liu is a Taiwanese immigrant who voted for Obama in Oakton, Va.

"If Obama is elected," he said, "I think he's more for having the country united together rather than all those attacks going on. I'm hoping that if he's elected, maybe you bring a more positive thinking to society right now."

Going into Election Day, most national polls showed Obama with a solid lead in the states that had voted for Democrat John Kerry in 2004, and also leading or tied with McCain in a number of states that voted for President Bush. That gives Obama numerous ways to reach the 270 electoral votes needed to become the nation's first black president."


How exciting is this! Obama just won in Ohio. It's so wonderful! If Obama is president (which now it's pretty clear that he will with Ohio), I just feel like our rut will be broken. Our disgusting history of white Christian men believing they're this alpha creature, who push us back further and further into the past (which is stupid!). I would really just rather not have a racist, sexist president! I would not stand for a government run by a man who air-quotes women's health, bans rights, and who chooses a running mate who thinks the most important part of her campaign is sweaters and defines her own form of feminism with a $35 wedding ring...and then talks about plans to ban the morning after pill. Yeah. Okay. If that were the case, I would move to Canada in a heartbeat. And, honestly, I've noticed that it's starting to become common ground among even the most Conservative [and Midwestern!] Americans. I have crazy old religious folk [wearing ridiculous religious parafanilia and T-shirts reading "Jesus Is Real"] coming in to my Starbucks talking to my partners, undecided young folk, trying to convince them to vote for Obama. They. Want. Change. And there's definitely something to be said about Colin Powell endorsing Obama. [Hehe, in Stephen Colbert's words, "John McCain, the only way you could truly be a maverick is to endorse Barack Obama"] Now. I would say... That's common ground. Everyone has different ideas on what kind of change they want, but it's happening. People finally joining together again for change.

I would like to be happier with the country that I live'd be cool to not be so ashamed to live in America. I just think this is the start of something big! Which is what we need! Happy! My blood is jumping all around everywhere! HISTORY IN THE MAKING. WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT?! I'M TOO EXCITED RIGHT NOW. It's so exciting that I'm here for it too...I voted for Obama in Ohio! Yipee! By the way. My roommates are pissed and racist. One of my roommates' responses to Obama's win in Ohio:

Her: "There's a lot of black people in Ohio."

Me: "So, you're saying that black people have no other political opinion beside the color of their skin?"

Her: "Nope. They don't."

Sorry you're going to have to live under a black president, rather than a "maverick" of a president.

Glad I'm going home soon.